


Silence

by heartsdesire456



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Future Fic, Getting Together, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-17
Updated: 2013-07-17
Packaged: 2017-12-20 13:00:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/887563
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartsdesire456/pseuds/heartsdesire456
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For all the times Derek wanted Stiles to just <i>shut up</i>, nothing was more terrifying than when he actually did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Silence

**Author's Note:**

> Just a short little get together ficlet (well, okay MY version of a ficlet, I never write stuff this short) I couldn't not write. Have and enjoy!

For all the times Derek wanted Stiles to just _shut up_ , nothing was more terrifying than when he actually did.

Derek had no idea what was going on when the pack congregated at the loft for a meeting and, for the whole night, Stiles didn’t say a word. I wasn’t just him that seemed to notice. Everyone would glance over at him, but only Scott seemed unsurprised. Derek spent even longer after most of the pack left watching a silent Stiles sitting on the couch reading something from his textbook while Scott and Isaac played video games. Scott and Stiles were staying the night rather than driving back to their apartment the next town over. 

Stiles and Scott had both made the choice to go to a local college. Derek had argued with them that pack business shouldn’t stop them from picking the school of their choice, but Stiles had explained later that Scott didn’t get into any bigger schools than the local college and that he wanted to stay nearby for his dad anyways. They were all each other had so he didn’t want to leave him for months at a time. When Derek tried to talk him into at least trying for a bigger school, since Stiles had amazing grades in high school, Stiles had just argued that a degree in criminal justice from one school was just as good as a degree from a better school and that he had always wanted to be a cop like his dad, so it didn’t matter to him. 

Isaac had decided to put off college for a year and Derek didn’t blame him. Isaac’s life had been rough even for one of their ragtag group of Team Life Sucks and he deserved extra time to work things out. Boyd didn’t bother with college, and Cora was getting her GED at Derek’s insistence after refusing to go to high school. She also refused to live with him and Isaac, choosing – in what had honestly been one of the biggest slaps to the face Derek had ever received – to live with Peter when he finally got around to getting a house. 

Derek didn’t even notice he was scrubbing the same spot on the counter while thinking about Cora’s decision to live with Peter until Scott sat down his empty can of soda right in the way of Derek’s scrubbing, snickering when he knocked it over. “What do you want?” he growled and Scott shrugged.

“Just messing around,” he said, walking past Derek to get two bottles of water.

Derek looked over and noticed Stiles still hadn’t moved and he paused. “Hey what’s up with Stiles?” he asked, lowering his voice. “He hasn’t said anything all day.”

Scott cringed. “Stiles Day of Silence,” he said and Derek raised an eyebrow. Scott frowned. “He’s never told you?” he asked, and Derek shook his head. Scott hummed. “Weird, I thought you two were all… you know,” he waved a hand in a vaguely zig-zag motion. “Well, he’s spent the night here a few times is what I’m saying-“

Derek flushed. “No. Just… he helps me research and I let him stay. _No_ ,” he stressed and Scott snorted.

“I swear to God, Stiles is going to die a virgin if he keeps this crap up,” he said without explanation and then walked away, leaving Derek wondering what the hell had just happened.

~

Derek was the only one still awake when midnight rolled around, and he was surprised when Stiles walked past where he was sitting at the kitchen table with his computer and offered a random, “Try ‘red cap’ not gnome.”

Derek thought nothing of it as he typed the new query, only to stop when he realized Stiles spoke. He looked up and saw Stiles pouring coffee. “Wow, I wasn’t blessed with you suddenly losing your voice. Damn,” he droned and Stiles rolled his eyes. When he sat down beside Derek, Derek nudged him. “No really, are you okay?” he asked, voice low.

Stiles fidgeted before looking up with a sad smile. “I’m okay,” he said, turning back to the screen. “It was- yesterday - well technically yesterday, since it’s past twelve – was the anniversary of my mom’s death.”

Derek looked up quickly. “I’m sorry,” he said and Stiles smiled tightly.

“It’s okay. I just… it’s a thing.” He shrugged. “I don’t talk. It started because I couldn’t, but by now it’s just tradition. Mostly now it’s to keep my dad from trying to talk.”

Derek nodded. “Do you mind- is it a bad thing for me to ask how long since…”

“Since she died?” Stiles started, then shook his head. “Six years,” he said, sighing harshly. “Six years and just… it feels like forever and nothing,” he admitted. “It’s crazy,” he said, looking down at his mug. “It’s been six years but sometimes I’ll still do something and think ‘Mom would love this’ and then remember ‘oh yeah, six years’ you know?” he asked softly.

Derek swallowed hard, hand clenching into a fist on his thigh. “Actually I do,” he said and Stiles nodded in understanding. “Laura mostly. I mean, it’s been nine years for the others but it’s only been three since she died.” He chuckled weakly. “Cora doesn’t help. I accidentally called her Laura twice.” Stiles gave him a sympathetic look. “She looks like her, you know? And when I slipped and called her Laura, she got this look like she was afraid I was going to lose it. Cause it was always me and Laura as kids. Cora was five years younger than me and seven younger than Laura.” He swallowed hard. “Laura was the only thing I had for a long time and before that she was my best friend and Cora knows that so I don’t blame her for thinking I was going to lose it.”

Stiles chuckled weakly. “That’s how I am about my mom. I never want to mention her because if I say something about her, my dad just… he gets this look and I feel even worse because I didn’t want to make him look like that.” He sniffled slightly and Derek’s heart flipped at the tightness in his voice. “I’m probably the only kid with a single parent who tried their hardest to get their parent to date again,” he said and Derek gave him a questioning glance. “I don’t like my dad being alone,” he said tightly. “Especially since I moved out three months ago. He’s alone at home. I hate it. I hated it even when I still lived there.” He bit his lip. “I get it, he still six years later hasn’t been able to move on, and I understand because my mom was the most amazing person that probably ever existed and they were married a really long time, but I just wish he had somebody because I hate thinking how bad it must be to hurt so much from losing someone that you don’t even want to try again, you know?” He looked up with sadness heavy in his eyes. “I miss her enough without commiserating over how much he misses her too.”

Derek nodded. “He’s your dad. It makes sense you want him to be happy. But maybe he just hasn’t met the right person yet?” he suggested and Stiles snorted.

“Scott and I have been trying to set him up with Scott’s mom for the past two years, dude. They just won’t freaking bite. They’re firmly settled into ‘bros’ and it’s frustrating,” he said with a small smile, as though trying to force past the sadness. He sighed. “I dunno. Maybe I should get him a dog. He wouldn’t be so alone if he had a furry friend at home.” He smirked. “I’ve got Scott, he could use one too,” he said and Derek rolled his eyes.

“Dog jokes. Again. Do you ever run out?” he asked, and Stiles gave him a playful glance.

“Never. I’m just gonna think up more and more as time goes, you know this,” he said, nudging Derek gently. “Alright, so. Do you have anything on red caps?”

Derek shook his head, shutting the laptop. “Nope. I’m done. I give up. It’s pointless. The freaking Travelocity gnome is out to get me for not booking a flight home and choosing to drive back to Beacon Hills. I’m convinced.”

Stiles burst out laughing, then quickly covered his mouth, glancing over at the living room to make sure he hadn’t woken up Scott and Isaac. He shoved Derek, who just grinned at him. “You’re terrible,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Come on, let me give it a shot.”

Derek slid the laptop over, then put a hand on it to stop him. “You wanna just do this in the morning? I’m exhausted,” he said apologetically. “And no offense, but you look it too.”

Stiles gave him a questioning look. “I guess we can. But I was gonna head home. It’s late and Scott and Isaac took the couch,” he said, nodding.

Derek frowned. “It’s past midnight and that’s a forty minute drive. You aren’t really going to wake up Scott are you?” 

Stiles hesitated. “Well when you put it that way…” He yawned, and slumped. “Okay, but is Isaac going to be okay with me in his bed? I’m not sure I should invade his ‘safe zone’, you know?” he said, and Derek hesitated, then stood up, hastily looking away as he spoke.

“You can stay with me,” he suggested, putting the laptop on the counter. 

Stiles didn’t respond so Derek turned back, leaning on the counter to look at Stiles. Stiles raised an eyebrow and Derek didn’t blink or look away, so he shrugged. “If you’re okay with it.”

Derek looked down at his toes. “Not the first time we’ve shared a bed. It’s bigger than your old bed,” he pointed out.

Stiles gave him a curious look, though the corner of his mouth twitched. “Yeah, but I was sixteen and you were injured,” he said, then shrugged, standing. “Hey, it’s cool with me if it’s cool with you.”

Derek nodded. “It’s better than messing with Isaac’s room,” he said, and Stiles just nodded. “I’ll get you something to sleep in,” he said, turning to leave the room before he could say anything else.

~

When Derek woke up, he was surprised at how _comfortable_ he was. Derek couldn’t remember the last night’s sleep he got where he slowly drifted awake, feeling warm and happy. He stretched his legs out, moaning tiredly as he pulled the warm, soft object in his arms closer, rubbing his face into his pillow.

He froze suddenly when he realized the ‘pillow’ was moving. He opened his eyes and was startled for a second to see brown hair, only to remember going to bed with Stiles the night before. He took a moment to take stock and couldn’t help but cringe at the way his arms were curled pretty much completely around Stiles, holding him close. His cheek had been resting against Stiles’s shoulder blade and his left hand was slid up the front of Stiles’s shirt. Worse still, Derek’s body had apparently decided to react like a teenager in response to Stiles’s ass pressed against it. 

He was just contemplating how the hell to move without waking Stiles up when Stiles _laughed_ softly. “I’m enjoying your silent wolfy panic way too much, dude,” he said, and Derek grumbled, carefully extracting his hand from Stiles’s shirt. “You don’t have to,” Stiles said, laying his hand lightly on Derek’s wrist. “Move, I mean.”

Derek huffed out a breath. “I’m pretty sure it’s better for both of us if I do,” he said, sliding his hand free. He curled his hand around Stiles’s hip to hold him still. “Sorry,” he mumbled, backing up a little so that his erection wasn’t pressing against Stiles.

Stiles just chuckled, rolling onto his back to look over at Derek’s guilty face. He smiled a sleep-soft smile and stretched his arms up over his head. “Seriously, I’m a dude, I totally understand the reaction to a body in bed with you,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows as he rested his arms above his head. “You sure as hell don’t have anything to be ashamed off.”

Derek flushed. “Stiles!” he barked and Stiles giggled. He turned his face into the pillow and groaned. “I’m twenty-five years old, why?” he whined.

Stiles snorted. “Early to mid-twenties are a man’s sexual peak.” Stiles rolled onto his side, closer to Derek. “Not exactly complaining,” he said softly, reaching out to touch Derek’s cheek, eyes lingering on his lips.

Derek’s breath caught and he blinked. “Stiles…” His words died when Stiles’s thumb swiped across his bottom lip.

“Tell me to leave, Derek,” Stiles said softly, nails scraping along Derek’s stubble-scratchy jaw.

Derek’s eyelids fluttered and he bit back a pleased sound as sparks skated down his spine. “We shouldn’t.”

Stiles smirked, pupils dilating some at the husky tone of Derek’s voice. “Unless I’m reading this way wrong and you don’t want to, we really should.” He leaned closer. “Derek, tell me I’m not wrong.”

Derek swallowed. “Stiles, stop,” he said, putting a hand on Stiles’s chest.

Stiles’s eyes shut and he sat up. “Shit, Derek, I’m sorry,” he said, starting to slide out of the bed. “I had the wrong idea, it’s my fault-“

“Stiles, no,” Derek grabbed his wrist, bracing himself on one elbow to catch him. “You don’t have the wrong idea,” he said, not letting go until Stiles stopped trying to get up and just sat there, picking at the covers piled around his waist.

“Then what idea should I have?” he asked, not looking up. He sighed, putting his face in his hands. “Jesus, Derek, I can never get a read on you. The past few months I spend more and more time thinking you've really been looking at me one way, but then every time I so much as hint at anything you go back to being that same asshole you’ve always been.” He fell back against the pillows, knees pulled up. “I don’t know what you want from me anymore.”

Derek looked over at him, biting his lip. “What I want… isn’t the problem.” He looked down at his sheets awkwardly. “You’re-“

“I swear to God, if you bring up my age, I’m going to wolfsbane your ass,” Stiles threatened angrily, but Derek shook his head.

“No, what was going to say is that you’re _important_.” When Stiles turned to look at him, he was surprised to see how vulnerable Derek looked. “You’re important to the pack and important to me.”

Stiles frowned. “Derek, then why-“

“Because I fuck everything up,” Derek said weakly. “Everything thing I touch turns to crap. I don’t want to fuck you up, Stiles. You’re too important to me to ruin your life by getting any closer than I already am.”

Stiles stared at him in wide eyed surprise before sitting up again. “Derek, that’s not true,” he said, reaching out to push his fingers through Derek’s hair. Derek’s eyes fluttered and he leaned into the touch with a look to tender and needy that Stiles’s heart threatened to beat out of his ribcage. “Is that- is that why you push me away when I get close?” he asked.

Derek looked up with a heaviness that Stiles felt to his core. “You’re the only person who has never turned their back on me, Stiles. Even when you didn’t like me, you never turned me down when I needed your help. I can’t lose that. I can’t lose _you_.” He shook his head weakly. “You deserve better than that.”

Stiles gave him a stern look. “You self-sacrificing asshole,” he muttered, then leaned down, fitting his lips against Derek’s without preamble. Derek made a soft sound, but didn’t hesitate to make the most of the small kiss. “Don’t be stupid, Derek.” He looked into his eyes when the kiss broke. “Do you have any idea how you make me feel?” 

Derek looked down. “I tried to not think about how you might feel. It’s harder to say no if I can’t convince myself that I’m just projecting.”

Stiles smiled sadly. “Derek, it hurts to think that you would rather lie to yourself and not take what you could’ve had as soon as you wanted just because you feel like you don’t deserve good things.” He leaned their foreheads together. “You deserve to be happy.”

Derek swallowed. “I don’t want to risk losing you. I’d rather have you kept at arm’s length than lose you.” He shook his head. “You’re not too young to know what you want, but you’re still young enough to change your mind at any time. Even if whatever force out there that likes to ruin my life lets me keep you, I don’t want something to happen and then when it ends, you leave for good.”

Stiles shook his head, kissing Derek again. Derek still seemed to be savoring each kiss like it was the last one and Stiles shoved Derek onto his back, following him so that he was laid beside Derek, half on top of him. When he pulled back, Derek curled one hand around his wrist and the other around the back of his neck. “Derek, I’ve been in love with you since I was in high school, I’m not going to change my mind about that,” he said, looking into his eyes. 

Derek gave him a small, hopeful smile, but still said, “You were in love with Lydia Martin for seven years.”

Stiles narrowed his eyes. “I fell in love with her when I was eight years old because of her _hair_ and it was easy to just get used to it. Do you really think a childhood crush compares to real, adult feelings?” 

Derek stroked his thumb down Stiles’s neck. “You’re nineteen, how much of an ‘adult’ are you?” he challenged playfully, but Stiles just smiled and leaned down to kiss him again.

Stiles nipped at Derek’s top lip, tongue flicking against it before he pulled away. “I spent two years begrudgingly thinking you were a hot jackass. Then I realized that somewhere my mind and body had missed my heart butting in and letting you in. If you’re telling me I have even the slightest chance, I’m not backing off.” He pecked his lips again. “I’m stubborn when I want something, but I’m unbearable when I know I could have it if I tried hard enough.”

Derek chuckled weakly, smiling up at Stiles. “I cannot imagine you get more stubborn than you usually are.”

Stiles raised a challenging eyebrow. “Do you love me?” he asked, and Derek swallowed, but nodded, heart thumping against his ribcage. Stiles’s smirk deepened and he nodded. “Then watch me.”


End file.
